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Last night was as devastating a loss as I've ever experienced as a sports spectator. Actually, after a lifetime of sports involvement, last night was as devastating a sports loss as I've ever been involved with in any way. It changed me, somehow. For awhile, I actually lost faith in my capacity to experience joy. That's unbelievably childish, but I have given myself to this Cubs team in such a way that I am unprotected from the strong emotions that sports stir in me. It was really, really tough to take, even this morning. I didn't sleep well.

But there is still hope. I believe there can still be joy in Chicago tonight. The possibility of excitement still exists. We'll see if this philosophy will last--I need about 4 1/2 hours and I'll get back to you.